


Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!

by dancingassassin



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind Date, Craigslist, Explicit Language, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Family Issues, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Genji Shimada is a Little Shit, Humor, M/M, Only a tiny bit of angst, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving Dinner, mentions of genyatta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-02-09 19:28:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12895095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancingassassin/pseuds/dancingassassin
Summary: All Jesse McCree wants is to NOT have another Thanksgiving at Denny's. His work friends convince him to post an ad on Craigslist seeking a 'strictly platonic date in exchange for Thanksgiving dinner.' He doesn't expect anyone to respond.Hanzo Shimada finds himself in hot water when a lie he told his father to get him off his back comes back to bite him in the ass. He said he had a boyfriend. Hanzo does not, in fact, have a boyfriend. Genji takes matters into his own hands and starts looking at dating websites and then finally Craigslist.--Based HEAVILY on that Craiglist ad that goes around on tumblr about the felon who will pretend to be your boyfriend in exchange for Thanksgiving dinner.





	Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!

Jesse McCree tapped at his keyboard and squinted at the computer screen as he finished up his Craigslist advert. It seemed like a desperate way to get a Thanksgiving dinner, but he was tired of having to go to Denny’s on Thanksgiving. They overcooked the turkey or they were out of it by the time Jesse got there because of his weird work hours.

Having a Grand Slam for your Thanksgiving dinner wasn’t Jesse’s idea of a good time.

He skimmed over it one more time; he didn’t want to make any spelling errors. He didn’t want to come off as an idiot. _Though I doubt anyone is going to respond anyway…_

 

> _Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!_
> 
> _I am a 27 year old delinquent who didn’t graduate high school and has an old ass truck that’s a year younger than me. It’s got a bitchin’ flaming skull on it. I can play anywhere between the ages of 20 and 30 depending on if I shave and how I dress. I work late nights as a security guard. If you’d like to have me as your strictly platonic date for Thanksgiving but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, just to torment your family, I’m game._
> 
> _I can hit on other guests, I can go on political rants, I can pretend to be drugged up, you name it, I bet I can play it._
> 
> _I only ask for payment in the free meal I’ll receive as a guest._
> 
> _-do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers-_

 

Jesse stared at it for a few minutes longer and rolled his eyes. “God I’m fuckin’ pathetic.” Despite the words he said, he hit the post button and shut down his computer. No one was going to respond and he’d have Denny’s for Thanksgiving again. Like usual. Woo, party down.

He glanced over at the clock and sighed. He best be getting a shower in before he went to work. As much as he presented as someone who gave zero fucks, Jesse was meticulous in his personal grooming. He slumped out of the chair and huffed as he moved to the shower.

Maybe he’d be lucky enough to get some funny spam responses to the ad. That would at least make him laugh.

 

* * *

 

 Hanzo slumped back onto the sofa in the apartment he shared with his younger brother Genji. It was a few days before Thanksgiving and they had to go to their parents’ house for Thanksgiving dinner. Hanzo _hated_ going to their place for the holiday. It led to so many awkward questions that Hanzo tried to answer but often failed. Or his parents just disregarded the answers. They’d completely ignored the fact that Hanzo had come out _many_ years ago and his father was _still_ expecting him to get married and provide them with heirs for _family business_.

That wasn’t going to happen.

It wasn’t like he was going to pretend to be straight just to please his parents. He was done trying to hide his sexuality. Not that he had ever hidden it all that well. Hell, he was done trying to hide who he was period. He’d started dressing the way he wanted in the past few years, had gotten an undercut, had gotten _multiple_ piercings…

“Anija, sulking doesn’t change the fact that we have to go there for Thanksgiving.” Genji called from the kitchen.

There were a few banging noises that make Hanzo believe that Genji was _attempting_ to cook. That was enough to get Hanzo vaulting off of the sofa, if only to make sure they didn’t lose their security deposit because of his brother’s misadventures.

Unfortunately, Genji had already started cooking.

Rather, he had started _baking_. Hanzo wasn’t sure if that was better or worse. Either way, his oven was never going to be the same again.

“…what are you doing?” Hanzo knew it was futile to ask. It wasn’t like it was going to save his oven. Or the kitchen. Or their safety deposit.

“Baking!” Genji grinned as he carefully mixed ingredients. At this point, everything still looked okay. “I want to bring them to mom and dad’s.”

Oh.

_Oh_.

Well. That was different.

Hanzo was willing to forfeit their security deposit in exchange for watching their father have to taste Genji’s famous carbon cookies and _not_ do a literal spit take. The prospect was far too entertaining. He’d let go of the full month’s rent that they’d be losing due to the security deposit.  Hell, he’d almost pay _more_ money to see that.

“Well, they are always on us about bringing side dishes and whatnot…” Hanzo shrugged and then flopped down onto one of the two chairs in the kitchen. “Cookies are a side dish, right?”

Not really, but whatever. It would work. Rather, they’d make it work.

Hanzo’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he quirked a brow up. Genji was really the only person who texted him and they were in the same room. His younger brother was extra, but not _that_ extra…right? He sighed and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

 

**[From: Father, 5:31pm]** Your mother and I are looking forward to the date you said you will be bringing to Thanksgiving.

 

Hanzo froze and stared at the message from his father. _Oh shit_. He remembered the moment he told his father that he had a significant other _vividly_. He remembered that he’d said it _solely_ to get his father to stop asking about significant others for a few minutes. To get his father to stop trying to arrange a marriage that Hanzo had absolutely no desire to be in. “Oh fuck.”

“Huh?” Genji had battered smeared across his face now. Hanzo didn’t question how that happened. Some things were best left unanswered. “Why are you cursing?”

“…remember that day where I told father that I had a boyfriend just to get him to shut up about a potential arranged marriage?” _Fuck_. _He’s going to know I lied to him and **fuck.** He’s going to try and arrange a marriage. **Again.**_ The desire to go to Thanksgiving at his parents’ was waning to all-time lows.

“Oh yeah. That was hilarious. Wait…he told you to bring your boyfriend to Thanksgiving…”

Which was in three days.

Hanzo didn’t have a boyfriend.

He had three days to find a boyfriend and convince him to come to Thanksgiving at his parents’ place.

**_Fuck._ **

“So what are you going to do?” Genji grinned as he wiped cookie dough onto a kitchen towel. “You can’t just show up with no date. Dad will know you were lying.”

And Hanzo didn’t want to be caught in a lie. “Guess I have to find a date? Maybe I can convince a friend…”

What friends? It wasn’t like Hanzo really had many friends. He wasn’t as sociable as his brother and he’d be labeled an asshole a long time ago. He doubted that Genji’s friends would actually help him get out of this mess.

“I have an idea, anija, but you aren’t going to like it~”

No…that singsong tone meant that Hanzo was going to utterly hate his younger brother’s idea. It meant that the idea was going to be foolish, ridiculous, incomprehensible, or completely impossible. That tone meant there was a migraine in Hanzo’s imminent future.

“I’m certain that I’ll regret this, but help me, Genji.” Hanzo sighed and buried his face behind his hands. _I am an idiot. This is going to blow up in my face._ “You’re my only hope.”

It didn’t take long for Hanzo to help Genji with the cookies and clean up the kitchen. _We might make it out of this with our security deposit intact._ Soon enough, they were sitting on the couch with Hanzo’s laptop on the table in front of them.

“Wait, this is your genius idea? A _dating_ site?” Hanzo gave his brother an incredulous look.

“Beggars can’t be choosers, anija.” Genji tapped along through everything. “Who knows, maybe you’ll find someone nice!”

Hanzo grumbled under his breath about not needing _help_ in finding someone to spend time with, he just had to go out and _try_. He was just too tired after work most days to make that effort. Or at least that’s what he kept telling himself as he went through his martial arts workout every single night after work. No energy whatsoever.

To Genji’s credit, he was trying his hardest to find someone that fit Hanzo’s aesthetic that was also free for Thanksgiving. There weren’t many options. And the options there were, Hanzo shot down for various reasons. He could see Genji getting more and more frustrated with him and how picky he was – Hanzo appreciated that Genji was holding his temper. He knew that _he_ would have lost his temper if the tables were turned.

“…that was everyone on this site…” Genji muttered and ran a hand through his bright green hair. “Desperate times call for desperate measures.”

Hanzo didn’t really like the sound of that. At all. His eyes drifted to the website name. “Craigslist? Seriously, Genji??”

“You turned down everyone on the reputable dating site.” Genji poked his tongue out and started looking through the ‘casual encounters’ portion of the website. “Who knows what we’ll find here…”

They settled back into the same rhythm, Genji pulling up options and Hanzo shooting them down without hesitation. At least this time, they were laughing more because some of the ads were just _ridiculous_. And they were cringing. A few ads were opened only to find dick pics. No one wanted to see unsolicited dick pics.

“Oh…look at this one, anija. 27 year old _delinquent_ willing to pretend to be in a long term relationship in exchange for a Thanksgiving dinner. He’s only a year younger than you and he only wants food, seems perfect.”

Hanzo didn’t want to admit that his brother was right, that this ad was perfect. “What?? No. Absolutely not.” _The ad is perfect…but…_

Genji shot his brother an irritated looking before grabbing the laptop and darting away. Hanzo could only stare for a few moments – he was too shocked to do anything. He knew he should have expected something like this, but somehow he thought Genji would just back down a little. He got to his feet several seconds after Genji ran away and chased after him.

“Genji, I swear to all that is holy, if you respond to that ad, I will end you.” Hanzo growled against the locked door of his brother’s bedroom.

“What? I can’t hear you over the sound of how perfect this ad is.” Genji sang. “Ah…there, message sent~”

Hanzo deflated against the door and slowly sank to the floor. He was sure that the delinquent was a nice guy, but his parents would tear the poor guy apart. Rather, his _father_ would tear the guy apart. His mother would just mom at him. He didn’t want to be responsible for the metaphorical evisceration of some random guy.

His thoughts were interrupted by his phone buzzing again. Hanzo reached into his pocket and saw a message from an email he didn’t recognize. But what caught his attention was the subject: _re: Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!_

The guy had responded already.

“Genji. Genji we have a problem.” Hanzo’s voice was weak. He scooted away from Genji’s door so he wouldn’t get knocked out when his brother opened it. “Big problem. Colossal problem.”

Genji opened the door and poked his head out, he was all grins. “Oh…? What’s the problem?”

“He responded already.” Hanzo was almost afraid to unlock his phone and check the message.

“Go on, check it, see what he said!”

He knew that Genji wasn’t going to rest until he opened the message, so Hanzo obliged him.

>  
> 
> **Subject:** re: Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!
> 
> **From:** [red_deadeye_redemption@hotmail.com](mailto:red_deadeye_redemption@hotmail.com)
> 
> **To:** [SimpleGeometry@gmail.com](mailto:SimpleGeometry@gmail.com)
> 
> **Message:**
> 
>  Hey!
> 
> I’d be happy to help you out on Thanksgiving. My name’s Jesse McCree, btw. How about I meet you at your apartment and we can carpool to your parents’ place? That way you get to meet me before the dinner and we save on gas. I can be there at 16:30, does that work for you?
> 
> Thanks so much for helping me out, don’t think I can thank you enough. I wasn’t looking forward to another Denny’s Grand Slam for my Thanksgiving dinner, haha.
> 
> Looking forward to meeting you, Hanzo.
> 
> -JM

 

_Well fuck._ Hanzo stared at the email and sighed. The guy – Jesse – was excited about having a real Thanksgiving dinner rather than one at Denny’s and here Hanzo was worried about pulling the wool over his parents’ eyes. Again.

“So…? What’s the verdict?”

Hanzo jolted – he’d forgotten that Genji was standing right there. He sighed and ran a hand through the loose strands of hair that were hanging in front of his face. “Looks like I have a date.” He narrowed his eyes at the email. “…how did you get into my email, Genji?”

Genji didn’t respond, he just giggled.

He tapped out a response quickly, it only seemed polite to respond just as quickly as Jesse had.

 

> **Subject:** re: re: Alone on Thanksgiving? Need to rebel? Bring me as your date!
> 
> **From:** [SimpleGeometry@gmail.com](mailto:SimpleGeometry@gmail.com)
> 
> **To:** [red_deadeye_redemption@hotmail.com](mailto:red_deadeye_redemption@hotmail.com)
> 
> **Message:**
> 
> Hello,
> 
> Meeting at my apartment is fine with me, as is carpooling. I’m all for saving gas. 16:30 works for my brother and me. I appreciate meeting before getting to my parents’ place, it’ll help us formulate a backstory.
> 
> I’m glad to be helping you out, but I really should be thanking you, Jesse. You’re really getting me out of a bind.
> 
> See you soon,
> 
> -Hanzo

 

* * *

 

 The fact that someone had responded to his advert had Jesse over the moon. He was thrilled by the fact that he was going to have a _real_ Thanksgiving dinner. He had gone through the three days remaining before Thanksgiving with a bounce in his step. He’d been messaging back and forth with Hanzo – getting basic information and the like. He didn’t want to go into the situation blind. They’d even exchanged phone numbers to make communication even easier. What he’d gathered so far was he was just to act like a normal date. Nothing like starting political rants or stuff like that. A little more on the boring side, but a peaceful dinner was always nice.

Hanzo seemed pretty nice, if a bit stiff and formal. Jesse was actually really looking forward to meeting him. He wanted to see how Hanzo looked, put a face to the messages and all. They hadn’t exchanged pictures or anything like that – Jesse figured they’d be seeing each other quickly enough. But he was definitely curious. On paper, Hanzo seemed like the sort of guy who could have whoever he wanted – he didn’t seem the like the type that needed to go on Craigslist last minute to find a date so his parents wouldn’t ask questions.

That fact only made Jesse even _more_ curious.

He had been instructed to wear ‘whatever he felt like wearing’ and that if he had tattoos or piercings, be sure to show them as much as possible. Jesse couldn’t show _all_ of his piercings, but he could definitely show off his tattoos and some of his piercings. Looks like he was going to go with a punk look then.

 

**[From: Hanzo, 15:45pm]** hey – are you able to bring alcohol of some sort? Father just messaged and said that they are low on liquor.

 

**[From: Hanzo, 15:46pm]** my brother and I can bring some, of course, but I don’t know what kind you like so…

 

_He seems a bit flustered. Cute._ Jesse chuckled and tugged on his tattered black jeans and clicked his belt buckle in place. His favorite one – the BAMF buckle. Parents hated it because it was ‘crude.’

 

**[To: Hanzo, 15:50]** don’t sweat it, I’ve got a few things I can bring with. They’ll have mixers, right?

 

While Jesse wasn’t opposed to drinking liquor straight, it was definitely way more pleasant when there were mixers involved. He didn’t have to prove he was mainly or anything like that, he was fine with mixed drinks.

 

**[From: Hanzo, 15:51]** yes, they’ll have mixers. Thanks so much for being so understanding. See you soon.

 

Jesse chuckled again and finished getting dressed. He thought he looked sufficiently ‘not parent friendly.’ He shuffled off to the bathroom to finish up his personal grooming and style his hair. It didn’t take long, he prided himself on his ability to get ready quickly. It helped that styling his hair was just him messing his hair up a little.

He tugged his boots on and walked into the kitchen. He grabbed a couple bottles of liquor – whiskey, bourbon, and some dark rum. Jesse didn’t want to admit that he was a little nervous about this. As confident as he was, there was still something nerve-wracking about meeting new people. Which was only amplified when he was aware that he was meeting said person’s _parents_ as well.

His phone buzzed and made him jump so hard he nearly dropped his bottle of whiskey.

 

**[From: Lena, 15:57]** Heya! Happy Thanksgiving, Mac. You meet up with your platonic fake date yet?

 

Jesse rolled his eyes but couldn’t help but smile. Trust Lena to check in on him and make sure he wasn’t chilling out at Denny’s for yet another Thanksgiving. She wasn’t the only co-worker who checked in on him, but she definitely checked in the most.

 

**[To: Lena, 15:59]** not quite yet. heading out to meet him shortly

 

**[From: Lena, 16:00]** let me know how everything goes, Mac. Or if you need someone to get you out of the situation. You know I’m your girl for that!

 

It was true; Lena would call and pretend to be his mother to get him out of uncomfortable situations.

 

**[To: Lena, 16:01]** of course I’ll keep you in the loop. Who knows, maybe it’ll turn into a real date ;)

 

**[To: Lena, 16:02]** oop, gotta go. I don’t want to be late!

 

He rolled his eyes at the mention of it becoming a ‘real’ date. _Like that’ll happen._ Jesse broke into a jog, his stomach rumbling as he did so. He hopped into his truck and started toward Hanzo’s apartment. If he didn’t get caught at any lights, he’d make it on time.

 

* * *

 

Hanzo paced around the apartment and ran his hands through his hair for the umpteenth time. It was just a meal at his parents’ place. It was just a random person from the internet who was going to be accompanying them. There was no reason to panic.

There was every reason to panic.

“Chill out, Hanzo. Everything’s going to be fine.” Genji was lounging on the sofa. The container of cookies they were bringing with them to their parents’ place was sitting on the coffee table. They looked suspiciously good, but Hanzo knew that Genji had painstakingly shaped and decorated them to hide how _awful_ they were.

Hanzo was still looking forward to seeing their father try the cookies. For reasons.

“How can you say everything is going to be fine?” Hanzo continued pacing and grimaced when his hair completely escaped its ponytail. He only stopped moving to fix it.

“Because it’s gonna be fine. And if it isn’t fine, I’m with you. Nothing’s gonna happen.” That was a fair point. “Now settle down, you’re gonna wear a hole into the floor if you keep pacing like that.”

Hanzo opened his mouth to make a biting comment, but apartment’s buzzer went off. That meant Jesse was here. Or there was an ax murderer. More likely Jesse, though. Though there was the extremely unlikely chance that Jesse was an ax murderer. He shook those thoughts from his mind and moved to the buzzer.

Hanzo tapped the button and bit his lower lip. “Hello?”

“Hanzo? Hey, it’s Jesse. Mind lettin’ me up?”

Even through the crackly, shitty apartment speaker, Hanzo thought Jesse’s voice was damn near _heavenly._ Smooth like good liquor, warm, drawling. Hanzo could listen to him read the phonebook and he’d be happy as can be. “Uh…Hanzo?”

Right. He had to respond. Responding was important. “Yeah, sorry, buzzing you up now.” Hanzo tapped the button and waited near the door for Jesse.

It didn’t take long for Jesse to be knocking at their door. Hanzo opened it and opened his mouth to greet him, but his words died in his throat once he saw Jesse. He and Genji had speculated about how Jesse might look, but they had both been completely off mark.

Jesse McCree was _hot_. Brown hair, warm brown eyes, dark skin…and a smile that just seemed _natural_. The punk clothes only accentuated how attractive he was with how they hugged his body. Those pants were criminally tight and left little to Hanzo’s imagination. He was trying his hardest to avoid staring.

Jesse McCree was 100% Hanzo’s type.

**_Fuck._ **

He regained his wits quickly enough and managed a polite smile. “Hello Jesse…do come in. My brother and I just need to finish getting ready.”

Jesse tipped his hat and walked into the entranceway. “Not a problem, Hanzo. It’s nice to talk in person.”

_Fuck me sideways, he’s charming too??_ Hanzo smiled again and led Jesse a little further into the apartment. “It is, I agree. Ah, this is my younger brother Genji. Genji, this is Jesse.”

Genji looked at Jesse, then back at Hanzo, and then grinned in a way that was nearly deviant. “It’s nice to meet you, Jesse. Thanks for helping Hanzo out like this.” He hopped to his feet. “Anija! Let’s finish getting ready quick.”

Before Hanzo could say anything, Genji had grabbed his arm and was dragging him into his bedroom. “…what the hell, Genji?”

“He’s your type, Hanzo.” Genji was grinning in a way that made him seem like a shark. “You should go for him.”

“…he said on his ad that was it strictly platonic!” Hanzo hissed the words out and batted at Genji’s hands when he started trying to fiddle with his styling. “And I don’t even know him yet.”

“…oh…right. Well, you two should become friends then.” Genji huffed, grabbed a necklace, and threw it on Hanzo before Hanzo could even try to complain. “There, now you look perfect. Let’s go horrify our parents.”

Hanzo sighed and nodded. They moved back out into the living room, Jesse was standing politely and looking around in curiosity. Hanzo did his best to not stare, but he knew he was failing pretty hard, especially because he could hear Genji snorting back laughter.

“Before we go…we should figure out our backstory.” Hanzo straightened up – he could practically feel his father jabbing fingers between his shoulder blades to forcibly get him to stand with proper posture. “Like how long we’ve been ‘dating.’” Because he knew his parents would ask.

“Good idea.” Jesse had his hands on his hips and was grinning. “Well…how’s about we’ve been datin’ for…uh…six months? That seems like ‘meet the parents’ territory, doesn’t it?” Hanzo nodded, and Jesse’s smile got even brighter. “Oh, you okay with pet names? They kinda just slip out.”

Hanzo felt Genji elbow him and absolutely refused to react. Of course his brother would draw attention to the pet names thing. Because Hanzo _really_ liked that sort of thing from a significant other, perhaps because he and Genji never really had that sort of affection thrown at them when they were younger, though he couldn’t be certain.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Hanzo tucked his hands into his pockets to keep from fidgeting. “The pet names, I mean. And six months sounds good. Um…maybe we met at my work. I’m a tattoo artist.”

“Sounds good to me, darlin’.” Jesse winked and Hanzo tried to ignore the heat that flashed across his face and into his core.

They went back and forth over a few little details of their faux-relationship with Jesse tossing in pet names here and there. They covered boundaries – Hanzo said that Jesse could kiss his cheek, put his arm around him, little things like that. Things that made the relationship seem _real_. Things that were going to make Hanzo melt. _I’m going to die by the end of the night if he keeps calling me those names…_

“Hate to rush things, but if we don’t leave now, we’re going to be late. And you know how father gets about late, anija.” Genji started pushing Hanzo toward the door.

Yes, Hanzo was well aware of how father got about lateness and it was almost enough for him to _purposefully_ be late. But he appeased his brother and they all packed up to leave. They opted to take Jesse’s truck – the one with the bitchin’ flaming skull emblazoned on the side. It would make a nice statement when they pulled up.

The drive to their parents’ place didn’t take very long at all. Hanzo half wished that it had taken longer if only because the conversation was flowing so nicely while they were in the truck. Jesse had a wicked sense of humor and a laugh that made Hanzo’s legs feel like jelly. He got along with Genji, but was definitely paying more attention to Hanzo, which was rare. Everyone tended to like Genji more since he was more easy going. Not that it really mattered, they weren’t really dating. But Hanzo was allowed to preen a little bit. It made him feel _nice_.

They piled out of the truck and Hanzo couldn’t help but smirk when he saw his father peering out the window and watching them arrive. From this distance it was difficult to read expression, but it looked distinctly horrified. _Good._ He blinked when Jesse took his hand and laced their fingers together. The faintest of blushes was on his cheeks at the simple action, the blush only intensified when Jesse flashed a brilliant grin and winked at him. But he liked the little show of solidarity. It was…nice. It was nice to not have to face his parents ‘by himself.’

The trio entered the large, rather fancy home a moment later. Hanzo straightened up to his full – and not very tall – height and made sure to pull his shoulders back. Just like their father had taught him. He smiled when his mother came to greet them, her face bright from her soft smile. While their father was aloof and distant, their mother was warm and showed her love readily. Hanzo had always been close with her. He watched her gaze fall on Jesse – and if she had any negative reactions, they didn’t show on her face. She first went to greet Genji, embracing him and then kissing his cheek. Then she moved to Hanzo.

“Hello mom…” Hanzo bowed slightly and then moved to kiss her cheek. “You look lovely and dinner smells fantastic.” He pulled back and took Jesse’s hand again, his hand was almost like a security blanket. “Mom, this is my boyfriend, Jesse McCree. Jesse, this is my mother, Shimada Akane.”

He could feel his father watching his every move and Hanzo hated it. He felt like he was under a microscope and, really, he probably was. _I wish he would stop staring at me like I’m a freak…_

“It’s a pleasure to meet your acquaintance, Mrs. Shimada.” Jesse tipped his hat and smiled in a way that made Hanzo melt on the inside before reaching to shake her hand. “It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“And it is nice to meet you as well, Jesse.” She responded with a sweet smile. All politeness. “Hanzo so rarely brings significant others to meet us, you must mean a lot to him.”

_Ah…I didn’t think of the mom guilt that would be thrown around…_

“Well, can’t speak for him, but he means the world to me, Mrs. Shimada.” Jesse sounded completely sincere.

It was at that moment that Hanzo saw his father moving in to greet them. Hanzo stiffened a little and squeezed Jesse’s hand a little tighter without really realizing what he was doing. He saw the smallest of frowns tug at Jesse’s mouth, one that was barely noticeable. _He noticed me tensing up…_

“Jesse, this is my father, Shimada Sojiro. Father, this is Jesse, my boyfriend.” Hanzo spoke evenly, with far more deliberate enunciation than he had been using before. Very obviously trying to keep himself calm and level-headed.

Unlike his mother, his father didn’t hide his disdain for how Jesse appeared. Or for how _Hanzo_ was dressed. It was evident in the way his lip curled back ever so slightly and the way his brows furrowed together. Hanzo could read it like a book: _disappointment._

“Nice to meet you, sir.” Jesse was nothing but polite and respectful.

Hanzo’s father was still metaphorically looking down his nose at Jesse, which irked Hanzo to no end.

“And you as well. Why don’t we sit down and start eating?”

It was phrased like a question, but Hanzo didn’t really feel like there was an option. It was time to sit down and face the music.

 

* * *

 

The Shimada family was nice enough, at least that’s what Jesse thought. Hanzo looked a lot like his mama, especially when he smiled. Genji took a bit more after their father, though he still had the same smile as Hanzo and their mother. Shimada Akane was a pleasant woman who seemed to genuinely care about both of her sons. She fretted over them in the most adorable way…it really brought warmth to Jesse’s heart. And there was a hint of fire there that he really liked as well, reminded him of _his_ mama.

But Shimada Sojiro was nothing like his wife or sons. He was aloof and almost _cold_. What bothered Jesse the most was that Hanzo almost seemed scared of his father, though he was determined to not show it at all whatsoever. Or at the very least was _intimidated_ by his father and determined to not show it. At the very best, Sojiro seemed to be disapproving of his sons’ lifestyles.

“Genji, when are we going to be meeting one of your significant others?” Akane smiled as she passed the mashed potatoes around the table. Jesse was noting that she always said ‘significant other’ rather than denoting a gender. Jesse liked that. It was considerate.

“Ah…you know…” Genji rubbed the back of his head and gave an awkward smile. “Zen travels a lot, so it’s hard to make all of our schedules work together, you know? He’s in Nepal right now, otherwise he’d be here today.”

That seemed to appease Akane, though Sojiro still looked sour. Though Jesse was starting to wonder if that was just his normal face.

“Jesse, how did you meet Hanzo? He hasn’t told us…” Again, it was Akane asking the questions while Sojiro remained stoic and silent.

“Oh, at the tattoo shop he works at. I was gettin’ an estimate for another piece I have planned and Han was the one to help me out.” Jesse spoke smoothly and then took a sip of his drink. “I was so smitten that I asked if he wanted to grab some food and drinks after his shift…an’ he said yes.”  Jesse leaned over and kissed Hanzo’s cheek for emphasis and couldn’t help but smile at the slight blush that formed on his cheekbones. _He’s really damn beautiful…I really shouldn’t be thinking like that though. Platonic date. Don’t fuck it up, McCree._

Considering they hadn’t gone into great detail about their backstory, Jesse thought he had improvised pretty well. It was believable, kind of cute too. Hanzo seemed on board with it given the smile on his face. And Akane seemed pleased with it as well. But Sojiro…he looked even stonier than he had five minutes earlier. _Is there anything that makes him happy? Jesus, I can see why Hanzo doesn’t bring people home…_

“When will you be joining the family business, Hanzo?” Sojiro’s tone said a lot that his words did not- that Hanzo’s chosen career wasn’t acceptable.

That just didn’t sit well with Jesse, weren’t parents supposed to support their kids’ decisions and choices? That’s how it was with Jesse and Gabe. Gabe wasn’t his father by blood, but he looked out for him and helped and supported him. He was more of a father than Jesse’s actual father. Jesse was a naturally protective guy and this situation was making him want to stand up and defend Hanzo…

“I am happy with where I am in life, father.” Hanzo spoke stiffly and Jesse noted his posture was ramrod straight again. It seemed to get like that whenever he spoke to his father, at least that’s what Jesse was noticing.

That was also a pretty clear ‘never joining the family business’ answer. Jesse could only assume that the ‘family business’ was boring as hell. Or just not Hanzo’s jam. Either way, his answer was clearly no.

For a moment it looked like Sojiro was going to say something, but Akane put her hand on his upper arm and he remained silent. It was only then that Jesse noticed that both Hanzo and Genji had tensed up for a moment. Now everyone was back to eating and complimenting Akane’s cooking ability. Before he realized what he was doing, Jesse gave Hanzo’s hand a squeeze beneath the table. Solidarity. A reminder that he wasn’t alone. Jesse was probably crossing all sorts of lines by doing that, but he found himself wanting to comfort and stand up for Hanzo. For both Shimada brothers, actually.

“I do apologize for all the questions, but Hanzo didn’t tell us much about you.” Akane tilted her head and smiled. There might have been a tiny bit of guilt trip in the words, all aimed at Hanzo, but Jesse thought she mainly sounded curious. “What do you do for work, Jesse?”

Jesse was happy to answer, if only to dissipate the awkward atmosphere. “Oh, I work all sorts of security. Sometimes body guard work, sometimes I’m a bouncer at concerts.” It wasn’t glamorous by any means, but Jesse enjoyed it, especially when he got to see concerts while working. Working security allowed him to use his skills for good. “Tough work, but I like it. Well, the hours kinda suck, they make it hard to see other people.”

That was Jesse’s only real complaint about his job – it prevented him from having much of a social life. But he’d befriended multiple people from work, so there was at least that. It made sure he wasn’t completely lonely.

“Then it makes sense that you met Hanzo, his hours are both late and odd.” Akane flitted to the kitchen, presumably to grab more food. Jesse could see why – Hanzo and Genji both seemed to have black holes instead of stomachs. He had _never_ seen someone eat that much before.

But without Akane in the room, the awkward mood felt like a heavy storm cloud hanging in the air. Less awkward and more _foreboding._ Jesse usually listened to his instincts, but he was hoping they were wrong for once. It felt like shit was about to hit the fan.

“I believe mom is getting dessert.” Genji still looked moderately tense, but his expression was far more mischievous. _All_ mischief.

It made Jesse a little nervous because everything was so terse. This really didn’t feel like the right situation or time for silliness, but Jesse’s gut could be wrong.

“I brought a dessert.” Genji motioned to a box of cookies – homemade. Jesse thought they looked pretty, but pretty didn’t mean they were good… “Would you care to try one, father?”

Jesse glanced at Sojiro and noted that his face had finally softened some. _Maybe he has a soft spot for Genji? But why not Hanzo?_

“Of course.” Sojiro reached and took one of the beautifully decorated cookies. He took a bite and it was like everything froze.

Both Hanzo and Genji were watching intently – which only confirmed Jesse’s theories that the cookies were likely bad or playfully tampered with. But Sojiro was the entertaining person to watch. He was chewing slowly with an expression so stoic that Jesse _knew_ it was a façade. It was almost like you could see the man’s spirit leaving through his eyes. He didn’t react negatively, just kept chewing until he swallowed heavily.

“Thank you, Genji. But your mother made pie, so I shall put these aside for later.”

Jesse had to admit that was a good way to handle the cookies. Maybe things would be less tense now. It felt like the tension had let up a bit, at least in Jesse’s mind. Maybe it was just wishful thinking.

Akane returned after a few more minutes with two pies – a caramel apple pie and a more traditional pumpkin pie. Jesse could feel his mouth watering at the mere sight of that apple pie. Any awkwardness was worth it because pie. Pie fixed all problems.

“Those look beautiful, mom.” Hanzo sounded more at ease than Jesse had heard him all evening. It was nice.

“Anything for my boys.” Akane smiled as she took a seat. “Hanzo, would you please cut the pie for us?”

Hanzo’s expression fell and he tucked his hands under the table. “I worked a late shift last night and had an appointment this morning, I’m afraid my hands are too sore to cut straight lines.”

Jesse didn’t feel like that was something to look upset over. That was just a side effect of his job. Sometimes Jesse’s back and knees ached and made terrible sounds. That’s just what his job caused – it showed he worked hard as hell.

“Perhaps if you worked in the family business, your hands would not be so sore.” Sojiro’s voice had taken on that icy tone again and Jesse felt the awkwardness in the air get even _worse_.

“As I said before, I am happy with where I am in my life.” Hanzo was speaking in a clipped, curt tone. Jesse could hear the irritation without even trying that hard…and he honestly couldn’t blame him.

It looked like both Akane and Genji were going to say something, but they didn’t get the chance. “I think happiness is real important for work.” Jesse interjected. “Best to do something you enjoy since you have to do it near every day. And he’s damn good at what he does.”

Jesse could see that Akane was smiling at the fact that he’d stood up for Hanzo, and Genji was giving him a subtle thumbs up. _Well, then it was the right thing to say…_

“This is not your business.” Sojiro sounded calm, but his expression was very obviously _angry_. “You could do better, Hanzo. Both with your job and your significant other.” Jesse heard Hanzo suck in a harsh breath. It sounded like Akane was trying to say something as well, but Jesse’s focus was completely on Sojiro so he couldn’t be entirely sure. “It would be best if you came to your senses before you are completely unemployable.”

Silence.

Complete and utter silence.

Jesse felt Hanzo squeeze his hand before standing up. “Apologies, mom. I believe we must be going.” His voice was pleasant, but there was a biting edge there. Jesse watched as Hanzo moved to his mom and kissed her cheek. “I am sorry that we are leaving so suddenly, but I will be in touch.” There was a pause, one that seemed to stretch on and on, before Hanzo spoke again. “And I would rather be completely unemployable than a complete asshole.”

It took Jesse a second to realize that he needed to be leaving with Hanzo, especially after that bomb of a comment. He got to his feet and moved to hook his arm around Hanzo’s shoulders. “Thanks for havin’ me over, appreciate it. Nice meetin’ both of you.”

 

* * *

 

Hanzo kept his cool as the three of them walked out of his parents’ house. It was difficult, but he managed to do so. Blowing up at his father wouldn’t do any good, no, if anything it would actively make things worse. Once they were outside, he rubbed at his face and sighed. _This is a fucking mess._

“I’m sorry that my father was rude to you, Jesse.” He spoke softly and his shoulders slumped down. _Oh my god I called my father an asshole, he’s going to **kill** me._

“Ain’t no problem, Hanzo. Don’t worry about it.”

But Hanzo _did_ worry about it. There was no discernable reason for him to feel like this, but he felt as though he _owed_ Jesse for this evening. After all, they hadn’t stuck around for dessert. Hanzo had been able to see how Jesse was eyeing that caramel apple pie.

Hanzo jumped when Genji’s phone chirped and he quirked a brow up to see who was texting his brother on _Thanksgiving._

“Oop, sorry. That’s Zen. He’s gonna pick me up.” Genji grinned and flashed a peace sign at the two of them.

“…you said he was traveling.” Hanzo deadpanned.

“I lied~”  Genji kept tapping away at his phone. “I just didn’t want to bring him home for Thanksgiving.”

Hanzo stared at Genji as though he had grown another head and made a sound that was similar to being strangled. _He’s leaving me alone with Jesse. The little shit! He’s making this an actual date!_ Though he couldn’t blame Genji for lying about where Zen was to their parents. Hanzo felt bad for putting _Jesse_ through this, but Genji and Zen were actually dating.

“He pickin’ you up here, Genji?” Jesse tilted his head. “We can wait with you if you want.”

“Yeah, he’s picking me up here, but I’ll be fine on my own. You two go and have fun~”

Hanzo really didn’t appreciate the teasing, taunting tone that his brother was using – like he was expecting him and Jesse to go and ‘do something fun.’ More than likely, Jesse would drop Hanzo back at the apartment and he would go back to his power sulk.

“Alright then. Hey Hanzo, wanna hit up Denny’s and get some pie? I wanted to try your ma’s, so I’m cravin’ pie now.” Jesse laughed weakly. “It’s fine if you don’t wanna, but I figured I’d offer.”

_That does seem preferable than going home and sulking…_ “I think I’d like that.”

Genji was smiling in a way that made Hanzo want to hide behind something. He was far too excited for something that was likely purely platonic. Still, if it made his brother happy to get all excited for nothing, Hanzo wasn’t going to stop him. He could just be disappointed when Hanzo told them the most they did was talk and eat pie.

“Alright, let’s head out then. Nice meetin’ you, Genji. See you around!” Jesse hopped into his truck.

Soon enough, they were on their way to Denny’s. It was quiet, but not so much that Hanzo was uncomfortable. It felt companionable, strangely enough. Even though they’d only just met each other. Hanzo never felt that way with new people, they tended to make him feel awkward and uncomfortable.

Perhaps the awkward dinner had given them some strange bond.

“Really, I am sorry that my father was a dick to you.” Hanzo leaned against the glass. “But thank you for coming with…having you there made it much easier.” He felt a little weird admitting things like that, but it was true. Jesse had made it _much_ easier.

“Nah, no worries. I’m impressed you just up and left. A lot of people I know would have just gotten into an argument.” Jesse glanced in his direction and grinned. “Plus, I work security, I’m used to people being assholes to me.”

Hanzo was about to respond, but they pulled up to Denny’s a moment later. He hopped out of the truck and started toward the door. Getting a table didn’t take long – there weren’t exactly many people there given that it was Thanksgiving.

“…thanks for bringing me to Denny’s too. I was actually upset that we had to miss out on dessert.” Hanzo had a wicked sweet tooth and he loved his mother’s pie. It was his favorite part of Thanksgiving.

“I feel, I kinda had a love at first sight moment with your ma’s caramel apple pie.” Jesse sighed wistfully. The faux-lovestruck expression on his face was adorable.

Hanzo let out a strangled little giggle at the thought before actual laughter bubbled up. The thought was ridiculous – falling in love at first sight with _pie_. But it was such a cute, _earnest_ action… Mainly cute. Hanzo thought it was _really_ cute. “I can’t blame you; that pie makes awkward Thanksgiving dinner worth it.”

Conversation became easier from there. Hanzo was honestly surprised at how easily it came – he had never been particularly skilled at casual conversation. But he was doing just fine chatting with Jesse. The topics ranged from pie to art to various movies they’d watched, even going as far as marksmanship. Jesse wasn’t into archery like Hanzo, but he was into shooting. The whole time it felt like Jesse was flirting, though Hanzo couldn’t be completely sure. Time ticked by and it seemed like it was very suddenly _late_. And the waitress was informing them that it was almost closing time.

Hanzo looked over to Jesse, who seemed equally as shocked, and laughed. He pulled out his wallet and took the bill. “Let me pay, after all, me having a hissy fit denied you the pie you fell in love with.”

Jesse tried to snag the bill away anyway, though he didn’t succeed. Hanzo could thank the years of martial arts training for his ninja-like reflexes. “Let me at least pitch in for tip?” He almost seemed to be pouting. _I shouldn’t think that Jesse pouting is cute, what the fuck…_

Hanzo conceded that Jesse could help with tip and the two of them calculated out something that compensated for the fact that they’d clogged up a table for half the night. On accident. It seemed they both had the same mentality of tipping your servers well. Hanzo worked in the service industry, he _always_ tipped well.

Soon enough, they were walking back out to Jesse’s truck. The air was chilly and Hanzo held onto his arms to keep a bit of warmth in his body. A moment later, there was a large, warm arm hooked around his shoulders. Hanzo only jumped a little, but couldn’t help but hide the surprise on his face.

“This okay?” Jesse’s voice was soft and it seemed like he was ready to retract his arm immediately if it _wasn’t_ okay.

“Yeah…yeah, this is fine.” _More than fine. I really shouldn’t be liking this so much…he’s just being friendly._

Jesse grinned and rubbed his shoulder as they moved toward the truck. “Can’t have you gettin’ cold, right?” He exhaled and laughed lightly. “An’ I can’t believe I still wound up at Denny’s on Thanksgiving…”

Hanzo felt a bit of guilt pool in his belly and he stared at the ground. “…sorry about that…”

“No…no! It was different this time, I had a blast. It’s been real nice gettin’ to know you, Han.”

It really had been nice getting to know Jesse. Hanzo was surprised to find that he’d been having fun, even if they’d sat through an awkward dinner. It almost felt like a real date, but Hanzo shook that thought away. Jesse’s ad had said this was a purely platonic thing. He wasn’t going to push his attraction and possible budding feelings into Jesse’s face. That was just rude.

“I had fun too…” Hanzo admitted. He could feel a little smile on his face. “I’ll admit that Genji was right to look on Craigslist. And to steal my laptop and message you.”

Jesse made a sounded that vaguely seemed like he was being strangled. “What??”

Hanzo snickered. “Yeah, Genji stole my laptop and messaged you. He’s absolutely ridiculous and a little shit. I might not admit to him that he was right…but…I am glad he messaged you.”

Jesse tugged Hanzo a little closer to him and laughed – though the laugh was a little manic sounding. “Well…I’m glad he messaged and I’m glad you decided to bring me with. Gotta admit…didn’t expect someone so pretty to be needin’ me to be their fake date.”

_He called me pretty._ Hanzo felt his cheeks getting redder at the praise. _I’m blushing like a school girl over being called pretty, what the hell is wrong with me?_ Worse than the blushing, Hanzo really, really wanted to kiss Jesse. And not just because he’d been called pretty…because he was having such a nice time. Because he genuinely liked Jesse…

“Didn’t expect someone so handsome to be posting a Craigslist ad.” Hanzo countered. Saying that didn’t help the slight flush on his cheeks, but it might make Jesse blush, so there was that. _I probably shouldn’t flirt…_

Jesse’s cheeks were a bit pink, but his head was tilted to the side and there was a thoughtful expression on his face. “So…maybe I’m bein’ a bit presumptuous, but…I think this went well. And maybe you’d like to go out with me again? For real though. A real date. I’m asking you on a real date.” The smoothness in Jesse’s voice frayed as he spoke and he was face-palming by the end.

It took a few seconds for Jesse’s words to sink in. And when they did, Hanzo froze. He could hear Jesse backpedaling, though he couldn’t quite make out the actual words. Right. Freezing generally denoted bad things, not good things!

“No no, I’d like to go out with you.” Hanzo stopped Jesse from pulling away. Somehow, that had him falling off balance and straight into Jesse’s chest.

Jesse caught him with ease and Hanzo’s heart started beating faster, harder. Neither of them spoke for several long seconds. Neither of them moved. Hanzo could scarcely breathe.

And then it was like the tension around them shattered. Hanzo pressed in closer and caught Jesse’s lips in a kiss that was charged and far more heated than it should be given where they were. He looped his arms around Jesse’s shoulders, keeping him close as can be. Jesse started backing him up, until Hanzo’s back gentle thumped into the side of the truck. He could feel the cold metal through his shirt, but it barely registered in his mind because of the searing heat growing between the two of them. There was a small voice in the back of Hanzo’s mind telling him that they should slow down, that this wasn’t the place, but it was quashed down when Jesse nipped at his lips and grabbed his ass. After several long moments, the two broke apart. Hanzo’s breath was coming in heavy pants and he was finding that he really liked the feeling of Jesse’s hands against him.

“…we should probably stop…” Jesse murmured against his lips after giving him a short, chaste kiss. “It’s cold out…an’ someone might get upset…”

Hanzo really didn’t want to stop. But… “We should…yeah.”

Silence fell between the two of them again. Neither had let go of the other – and Hanzo was more than amused that Jesse’s hand was still on his ass.

“Wanna head back to my place?” Jesse sounded a bit tentative when he breathed the words out. “No pressure, though.”

“Sounds great, Jesse.” Hanzo kissed him once more, soft and sweet, before finally pulling away fully.

He whipped his phone out as he hopped into the front seat of Jesse’s truck. He supposed he should text Genji so he didn’t worry…

 

**[To: Sparrow, 11:05pm]** Don’t wait up

 

Hanzo smirked at the message and then put ‘do not disturb’ mode up on his phone. He didn’t want to be interrupted by his brother asking about _all_ the things.

His eyes drifted over to Jesse, who was cursing as he fumbled with the keys. Hanzo wouldn’t usually do this – going home with someone he’d met that day. But…it felt like he’d known Jesse longer. Hanzo smiled and relaxed against the seat with his hand resting on the center console. A moment later, Jesse rested his large, warm hand on top of Hanzo’s. A warm smile was lighting Jesse’s face up as he spoke. “Ready?”

Hanzo shifted his hand and took hold of Jesse’s and squeezed gently. “Yes, I’m ready.”


End file.
